Sinclair

I’m resolved to buy Ella a ring tomorrow, but we still have to get through tonight first.

She was distant on the ride home, sitting across from me in the back of the limo instead of nestled against my side, as I prefer. She didn't speak until we reached the house, and then only to say she wanted to sleep in her own room tonight.

"Are you angry with me?" I asked, furrowing my brow in confusion.

"No, I just think a little space would be good for us," she answered, hugging herself defensively.

Maybe she's right, I thought, though it wasn't easy to hear my own thoughts over my wolf's snarling protest. I still hadn't understood her reluctance to indulge our desires, and I didn't want to pressure her if she wasn't interested. Even if she were, I thought pushing her too hard or too fast would be a mistake—it might spook her. "Okay," I finally agreed. "I'll notify the guards."

My wolf whined like a pup as I walked away, and I couldn't believe how attached I'd become to this sweet human in such a short time. I didn't like letting her out of my sight, knowing she was under threat, but this was so much more than that. I'd become so accustomed to sleeping with her warm body nestled in my arms or sprawled on top of me that I wasn't sure I could rest without her.

As I prepared for bed, I tried to calm my wolf, but it was nearly impossible. Finally, I realized I hadn't scent-marked Ella tonight, and I imagined that would soothe him. I pulled a t-shirt over my pajama bottoms and headed toward her room, fully aware of how ridiculous I was being, and not caring in the least.

However, upon arriving outside Ella's room, I immediately sensed a strange tension among the guards. I looked at them curiously, but their stiff postures and refusal to meet my gaze only heightened my concern. A moment later, a soft whimper emanated from Ella's door, and I understood. It wasn't a sound of worry, sadness, or fear, but one saturated with sexual pleasure. My ears perked toward her door, and I heard more sounds: the rustling of sheets, the gentle glide of fingers on wet flesh, uneven and excited breathing, and a pounding pulse. It was obvious what Ella was doing in my absence, and I had to stop myself from groaning aloud.

I silently dismissed the guards—knowing Ella would be mortified if she knew my men could overhear her. My own mind was divided on what to do; I doubted she wanted me to hear this either, though she probably wouldn't mind if she knew how open shifters are about sex. Even my men weren't embarrassed, only nervous about my reaction to their proximity to Ella during such an intimate moment. She might not be my mate, but she was carrying my pup, a claim as powerful and sacred to our kind. They knew how possessive and protective I was of her. They probably thought I'd rip their ears off for being within earshot. Still, it was their duty to guard her, and now it was mine until this private moment passed.

I was confident I was the least objectionable audience, considering our intimacy, but I had to keep reminding myself of this as time passed. Every time I wondered if I was using her protection as an excuse to eavesdrop, I put myself in Ella's shoes and remembered how humiliated she would feel about so many strangers hearing her in this state. Leaving her unguarded wasn't an option, so this was the lesser of two evils.

Nonetheless, it was absolute torture to listen to Ella finding pleasure this way, because every small pant and moan filled my head with explicit images. I could imagine exactly what she was doing, and the tiny sounds she emitted only further excited my wolf. He was nearly frenzied, demanding we intervene immediately. I should be the one pleasuring her; she shouldn't have to take matters into her own hands. This was a mate's job. If she were mine, I would march in right now, give her lush bottom a few swats for not making her needs known to me, then bury my face between her legs and pleasure her until she begged me to stop.

But she isn't mine. I reminded myself furiously, trying not to get so carried away by the fantasy that I gave in. Still, she's clearly aroused by the kiss, my wolf reasoned; she's probably thinking of us right now.

"We don't know that," I cautioned. "She didn't want to get involved, remember? Her current need might be related to that, or it might be the pregnancy, her hormones, or simply the fact that she's a living, breathing woman with a healthy libido. Either way, we have no right."

Ella's quiet ministrations sped up, and I prayed we were near the end—I'd given up all thought of scent-marking her. If I went in there now, I wouldn't be able to restrain myself or my wolf. I was rock-hard in my slacks, and as soon as Ella's need for privacy was over, I would let the guards return and trust her safety to them once more. Afterward, I was going to take a cold shower and relieve myself.

Ella's delicious murmurs finally crescendoed, and I wished I'd pressed her harder about her reluctance to start something romantic between us. This was only going to get harder as her pregnancy progressed, and my wolf was quickly losing patience. I couldn't understand his behavior. I'd had sex with plenty of she-wolves over the years, and he'd only ever pushed me to claim Lydia, no matter how much I cared about the women who came before her.

It's like he doesn't believe Ella is human—like he refuses to accept that I couldn't mark Ella even if I wanted to. And I don't want to… right? It's just my wolf overreacting because of the pup.

"If only we could mark her somewhere else," he suggested wistfully, completely ignoring my logic. "And don't even pretend like that idea doesn't tempt you."

Unfortunately, he was right, but it didn't matter how tempting the idea was. Mating marks are so intimate because they require allowing another wolf to bite your most vulnerable spot. Marking Ella somewhere safer would defeat the purpose.

"But just think about how amazing it would feel," my wolf urged.

Again, I had to stop myself from groaning aloud. The bastard was right. The last thing I wanted was to hurt Ella, but I was very experienced in bringing a she-wolf to the peak of pleasure before sinking my teeth into her. I was sure I could do the same for her—if only it wasn't her neck I had to bite.

"Goddess, stop it!" I internally shouted. "You're losing it! This is crazy talk. It's your cock talking, not your brain or even your heart. You don't really want this, and neither does she."

Right on cue, Ella climaxed, a soft keening escaping her lips. My hands clenched into fists, and I gritted my teeth against the intoxicating sound. It was only as I gasped for breath, suddenly worried I might actually burst through her door, that I heard my name on her lips. It was a mere whisper as she came down from her high, and I had no choice but to leave before it was too late. I stormed past the guards, waving them back to their posts, and raced to my shower.

A little while later, I found myself lying awake in bed, my cock hard again despite the release I'd found in the shower. Ella was the only thing on my mind, and I was beginning to wonder if I'd ever be able to think of anything else. That might have been the most erotic thing I'd ever heard, and I hadn't even seen it happening. Did she have any idea what she was doing to me? How irrational and crazed I'd become about her? I barely recognized myself anymore.