Chapter 104
Grayson’s POV
The heat from the fire was nearly consuming. I stood rooted to the ground, watching as it hungrily licked at the mansion's walls, spreading faster than I'd thought possible. Something dark and twisted flickered in the flames, and for a fleeting moment, a glimmer of satisfaction crept through me.
I had wanted this. I had planned this.
The thought filled my mind as I stared at the roaring flames, my hands trembling. I wished I could see his face—see him struggle, hear him scream as he tried to escape. But he wouldn't. He couldn't. I had ensured that.
Maria's magic had sealed the house shut. There was no escape.
I took a step closer, the heat pressing against my skin like a warning, when Elaine's voice shattered my thoughts.
“Why are you just standing there?!” she screamed, her voice sharp, raw with terror. “Our parents are in there!”
Her words hit me like a physical blow. My heart stuttered; for a second, I couldn't breathe.
“No,” I said, shaking my head, my voice trembling. “No, that’s not possible. They’re not supposed to be back until later. They weren’t supposed to—”
“They came back early!” Elaine's voice cracked. Her small frame trembled as she grabbed my arm, shaking me with surprising strength. “They’re inside! Go get help!”
Panic hit me like a tidal wave, crashing over me with the force of a thousand regrets. Not because of him, but because my mother, aunt, and uncle were inside.
No. This wasn't supposed to happen.
I turned toward the house, dread twisting in my gut. My feet moved involuntarily, carrying me forward even as my mind screamed at me to stop, to rewind, to undo what I'd set in motion. The fire raged louder, the smoke thick and suffocating, making it hard to see, hard to think.
Wolves were arriving, their howls echoing in the distance as they raced toward the mansion. Some had shifted, their massive forms clawing and biting at the structure, trying to pry open the sealed windows and doors. But it was no use.
I knew it wouldn't work. I had ensured that.
My legs felt like lead as I moved closer, the heat scorching my skin even from a distance. And then I heard it—a sound that froze my blood.
A scream.
Her scream.
My mother's voice pierced through the roaring flames, filled with a terror I'd never heard before. It froze me for a half-second before I turned, sprinting toward the back of the house, panic clawing at my throat.
“Mom!” I screamed, my voice breaking as I reached the backyard. The flames were more intense here, consuming the walls and windows with unforgiving ferocity. But through the smoke and fire, I saw her.
She was pounding on the glass, her face twisted in desperation, her lips forming words I couldn't hear over the deafening roar of the flames.
“Mom!” I screamed again, grabbing a rock and hurling it at the window. It bounced uselessly; the glass refused to shatter.
I threw myself against the wall, again and again, the heat searing through my clothes, the smoke choking me with every breath. “I’m here! I’m right here!” I shouted, slamming my fists against the wall. “Hold on! Please!”
But it was too late.
The fire was too strong, the smoke too thick. And Maria—Maria had ensured the spell would prevent anyone inside from shifting into their wolf forms.
I had done this.
My knees buckled, but I didn't stop. I screamed her name over and over, slamming myself against the wall until my body ached, until my throat was raw, until there was nothing left but the sound of her screams and the flames devouring everything.
And then, just like that, the screams stopped.
The silence was deafening.
“No…” I whispered, my voice barely audible as I fell to my knees. “No, no, no…”
I pressed my hands against the ground, the reality of what I had done crashing over me in waves. My mother was gone. Elaine's parents were gone. All of them, trapped inside because of me.
My head snapped up as movement caught my eye.
Elaine.
She was standing in the corner of the yard, her small figure illuminated by the firelight. She wasn't screaming, wasn't crying—she was just standing there, rooted in place, her wide eyes fixed on the flames.
She looked frozen.
“Elaine!” I called out, my voice breaking as I stumbled to my feet. “Elaine, don’t—”
But she didn't move. She just stood there, watching, her face pale and blank as the fire consumed everything.
And that's when it hit me.
I felt the weight of it settle over me, crushing and suffocating, as if the fire wasn't just outside but inside me, burning away everything I thought I was.
This wasn't supposed to happen.
The world blurred as I turned back toward the house; the flames still raged, the smoke billowing into the night sky. The wolves were still trying, still clawing and tearing at the house, but it was no use.
I had ensured that.
I stumbled back, my legs shaking, my heart pounding. My vision blurred with tears as the realization sank in.
I had killed them.
My mother. Elaine's parents. I just wanted my father gone and the pain to stop. But they were all gone now.
Because of me.
Ava's voice cut through the haze, sharp and commanding, pulling me from the dark recesses of my mind. "Here, drink this."
I blinked, realizing she was standing before me, holding out a glass of water. I hadn't even noticed her approach. With a grateful nod, I took the glass, my fingers brushing hers briefly before I pulled away.
The cool water slid down my throat, but it did little to soothe the rawness inside. I couldn't remember the last time I felt this kind of pain—sharp, unrelenting, impossibly heavy. My wolf was gone. I had said the words aloud earlier, but they still didn't feel real.
Hours had passed since I woke up. My voice was hoarse as I whispered the truth to Ava. Only to her. No one else could know. I had strictly instructed her to keep everyone away, to let them believe I was still unconscious.
The silence stretched on, oppressive and suffocating, until she finally spoke.
“Grayson,” she said softly, her voice tinged with hesitation, “how… how are you so sure? That he’s gone, I mean.”
I closed my eyes; the question cut deeper than I expected. How could I explain it to her when I didn't fully understand it myself? But I owed her an answer. She was the only one who knew, the only one I trusted with this.
“It’s not the first time,” I began, my voice low, each word a struggle. “The first time it happened was the day of the Feast.”
Ava's brow furrowed, but she didn't interrupt, waiting for me to continue.
“After we had that argument, I wanted to go for a run to clear my head,” I said, my mind pulling me back to that day. “Everything was fine—normal. And then, just like that, he was gone. One minute I could feel him, hear him… and the next, it was like he’d disappeared from my head entirely.”
Her lips parted, but she stayed silent, letting me speak.
“I tried to reach him, over and over, but there was nothing. Just silence. A void.”
“What did you do?” Ava asked quietly.
“I called Maria,” I said, my throat tightening at the name. “She… she did a spell. I don’t know what it was, but it worked. He came back.”
Ava's eyes widened slightly, and she nodded, piecing things together. “But this time—”
“This time was different,” I cut in, my voice rough. “When I was fighting those wolves, it wasn’t just silence. It was worse. It was like… like something snapped. Like the connection between us was physically severed. And then I was forced into my human form.”
She gasped softly, her hand flying to her mouth. “That’s why you weren’t healing,” she murmured, the realization dawning on her.
I nodded, my eyes closing as the memory of the fight replayed in my mind. The wolves, their snarling faces, the sharp claws tearing into me. The pain was one thing, but the moment I felt that connection break… it was unlike anything I had ever experienced.
“I tried to reach for him again,” I said, “But all I got was the void. It’s… it’s like he’s gone. Completely gone.”
The silence that followed was unbearable. I kept my eyes closed, not wanting to see the pity or fear in Ava's expression.
“Grayson,” she said, her voice breaking slightly. “How does it feel now?”
I opened my eyes, meeting hers for the first time since the conversation started. Her gaze was steady, but there was a flicker of something else—fear, maybe? Or sorrow.
“Empty,” I said simply, the word tasting bitter on my tongue.
“Empty?” she echoed, her voice soft.
“It’s like…” I struggled to find the right words. “It’s like losing a part of yourself. A part you didn’t even realize you couldn’t live without until it was gone. There’s this… this hollow space inside me where he used to be. And it’s cold. So cold.”
Ava's eyes glistened with unshed tears, but she didn’t look away. “Do you think… do you think he’s really gone? For good?”
I didn’t answer immediately. I didn’t want to say it out loud, didn’t want to give the thought any more power than it already had. But the truth was there, staring me in the face.
“I don’t know,” I admitted finally, “But it feels permanent. It feels… final. And if the realm finds out…”
I saw the realization settle in her eyes. “You will lose your throne.”