Chapter 240

My heart pounded like a drum. I had wanted to tease him, to test him, but now that he was responding, I chickened out. I was breathless, as if I'd just run a marathon. "Hayden, you…"

He stepped closer, and I instinctively recoiled. With each step, he moved from outside my door to inside my apartment, until I was pinned against the shoe rack, both of us still clutching the ridiculous bowl of oatmeal. To his credit, he hadn't spilled a drop.

My heart threatened to leap from my chest. Hayden said nothing, just stood close, staring. I couldn't meet his gaze, panic rising. What was I thinking, provoking him like this? Lena had encouraged it, warning that guys couldn't resist teasing. Well, I'd certainly acted foolishly. But it was too late to backtrack.

I had to regain my composure. I could handle Hayden only if I remained calm. I sensed I'd affected him, stirred something within him. But he was holding back, controlling himself. The vein in his forehead throbbed.

"Oatmeal delivered; you can leave now," I said, holding my breath.

Hayden remained motionless, silent.

"Hay—"

"Kiki…"

He cut me off, his voice low and husky, a feather brushing against my heart. Every nerve felt taut, a strange, intense sensation surging through me.

"Hm?" My voice trembled, sounding far too seductive. I bit my lip, afraid to speak further. I didn't even know this side of myself existed; it was frankly embarrassing.

I watched Hayden's Adam's apple bob before he cupped the back of my head with his free hand, pulling me against his chest. His husky voice tickled my ear. "Don't speak."

Wait, what?

Chapter 240

"Don't move, and don't speak," he murmured, his voice low. "I'm scared I won't be able to hold back."

My eyes widened. Was he admitting to those kinds of thoughts about me?

"Don't move. Be good," he whispered, fingers gently stroking my hair. He pulled me closer, his arms tightening around me. I wore a sheer silk nightgown, and he a light T-shirt; the thin fabric did little to contain the heat between us.

I'm not like Lena. I don't know much about anatomy, but I knew my nerves were on fire, buzzing with restless energy. They screamed at me. I craved something I didn't even know I wanted.

I wasn't a child; I was in my late twenties, a grown woman, but I'd never… you know… done it before. And that empty, aching feeling inside was unsettling.

I could sense Hayden's turmoil—his heartbeat, his breathing, the heat of his body against mine—all spoke the same language: he was completely captivated by me. No question.

But he still hadn't made a move. What did that mean? Was it self-control? Restraint? Or, as Lena suggested, did he not love me enough to take that step? Or perhaps he was too terrified of what would follow?

I couldn't ignore it. I needed to know. I had to get an answer.